• Follow Us on Twitter!

  • Latest Photos

  • Last Books Read

    Born to Run by Christopher McDougall - (K) Humorous and thorough history and science behind ultrarunners and long-distance running
    Long Walk to Freedom by Nelson Mandela - (K) An autobiography covering his childhood, years as a freedom fighter and incarceration. Inspiring and informative
    The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafón - (K&T) A mystery set in Barcelona involving an old book, a failed writer and murder
    Lush Life by Richard Price - A Lower East Side tale of cops, drugs and drinking
    The Chinese by Jesper Becker - (K&T) Modern history of my peeps, from the cultural revolution to the many failed economic and social attempts to move the country forward
    Setting the Table by Danny Meyer - A "how-to" on hospitality and business acumen by the restaurateur behind such NY institutions as the Shake Shack and Union Square Grill
    The Audacity of Hope by Barack Obama - Obama lays out what is wrong with the current government and how, vaguely, to change it.

  • Advertisements

The Approach

One time I gave K this book called “Difficult Conversations”.  I had read it once and found it very helpful and thought she would too.

What is it about?

Well, when a subject comes up that might be emotional or controversial, it explains how you can approach the conversation without causing somebody to get defensive and therefore scuttle your intended result. Instead you create an environment where feelings can be shared without causing undue pain or suffering while still getting your point across.

You are direct but in a way where you are clear and non-threatening.

For example, it explains how you should not use words like “never” or “always” as in “You NEVER take out the trash” or “You ALWAYS buy the expensive beer”.

Instead of using words like “but”, you try and use “and”. Like, “I understand that you thought you should buy 4 dresses and a painting and let me carry them home AND I think that I’m not sure where we have room for all of this in our small backpacks.”

You see what I’m getting at?

Well certainly with this book in mind, Kelly recently shared some news with me. Let me explain how it went down…

“Diesel. I’m writing a blog post. You should read it when I’m done.”

“Uhh OK.”

“OK. I’m done. Read it”


blah blah blah Diesel’s shoes are totally ugly blah blah blah

“What did you think?”

“My shoes are ugly?!”


“I asked you before I bought them if there were ugly. You said no.”

“Yea. I lied. I mean it seemed like you liked them so I said they weren’t. But they are”

“Why are you telling me this now? I have been wearing them for 6 months!”

You think this post is about that book right? Or how we handle these situations? It isn’t. It’s about shoes. And how I need some new ones to replace the ugly, waterproof ones.

I went to a few stores but they are all formal or they are made for teenagers. I don’t want to spend much money. Can you help (I’m looking at you Jen, Barb and Tarah and Lauren)? I need shoes that I can walk around a bit in Africa and then casually in Europe for a few months. I don’t think I can pull off white shoes…

I like Diesel. Are any of these good? Diesel Shoes

And the classic Samba



Can you help me?


3 Responses

  1. I like to lump myself in the fashionista crowd even if I don’t dress so much that way much myself anymore so here’s my vote:

    I am ALWAYS for classic Sambas for guys. Always. You can’t go wrong with them. Ever. They will go well overseas and at home. They have that ever-elusive mix of cool and classic.

    Go Samba!

  2. hey tim. I’m flattered. not digging any of the Diesel shoes. I agree, you can’t go wrong with the Sambas, though I am not a huge fan of them in black. They have a new “samba modern” that looks pretty cool. I’m digging the dark brown version. Hope this helps. When are you guys heading out again? Love reading your blog. xoxo to you and kelly.

  3. Ahhh so flattered!! I love the Samba’s!! You can never go wrong there. 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: