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TIC: This is China

This is China

When you get frustrated by the inefficiency, lack of cleanliness or misinformation from all sides, TIC.  You just say it to each other. This is something we learned from some Chinese-Canadian students traveling through China…

You hotel offers free internet service. You ask for the password. The reception has no idea what the password is or how to get one
TIC

Your driver honks at every passing car, cyclist and pedestrian, even if they are not in his way
TIC

Your driver drives the car in the middle of the road on 2 and 3 lane roads, centering on the broken white lines, only moving over when somebody honks at him or yielding to on-coming. traffic
TIC

You have one driver who drives like a bat out of hell along a broken road, swerving to miss fallen rocks, with no guard-rails and a shoulder that plunges 1000 ft to the river below while talking constantly into his cell phone
TIC

You have another driver who never goes above 60km per hour on the motorway.
TIC

When 2 of the 5 people in the minivan are obviously sleeping, your driver decides this is a good time to blast his new collection of Tibetan Techno.
TIC

You see an old woman reach deep into her diaphram, pulling all phlegm up and out as one big, brown loogie
TIC

You ask how long the bus to Dali is and are told it is 5 hours. Over 7 hours later, you arrive in Dali
TIC

You go to the “Ancient Town” only to find out that yes, an ancient town did once exist here but the government decided that a brand new, modern town made to look just like the ancient one would be much nicer and decided to tear the old one down in the interest of tourism
TIC

When you ask 5 different travel agents about flights to Lhasa from Shangrilia, at least 3 of them tell you such flights do not exist. The other two give you differing dates for when such flights depart – In the end you use the TAs computer to show them how to find flights online.
TIC

When little kids have the whole butt part cut out of their pants so they can pee and poop anywhere, anytime
TIC

Octagenarians shove you with both hands and cut in line showing no remorse.  Then they give you a genuine smile
TIC

You go to an outdoor gear store full of North Face, Arteryx, Columbia and even REI gear where all the logos look fake and you’ve never seen the styles/colors offered by the said manufacturer.  You ask the store owner if those are real.  He gets extremely offended and tells you of course not.  After asking where you’re from and chatting with you for about 15 min, he finally freely admits that yes, those are all copies, but damn good copies of the real stuff
TIC

All the TV channels are government owned, and even though there are about 8 of them, the programming loops every 5 hours and the same 3 commercials loop every 12 minutes
TIC
After spending the afternoon among millions of people (literally), you take refuge on the mountains.  During your peaceful hike, a bus packed with Chinese tourists and their big cameras pulls up and they blast their boomboxes, which they’ve brought from home especially for the trip
TIC

You go to a national park, but instead of walking on the trails, you are forced to see the park from a bus full of Chinese tourists
TIC

Everybody asks you how much money you make and how much your home costs
TIC

You purchase flight tickets online using your credit card and after receiving a confirmation email you are presented with the additional steps of signing and faxing an agreement as well as sending copies of your passport. After you complete these steps, you are informed that that price is no longer available and you should rebook online.
TIC

When numbers for anything from wi-fi passwords to lock combinations to the most desirable license plates and phone numbers involve any combination of the lucky numbers 8 and 6.  For ex:  668866, 8868866, etc.
TIC

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3 Responses

  1. Wow no desire to see China- ever…………..MTT

  2. This post cracked me up!

  3. […] no, I’m not just saying this because I’m Chinese.  If the last post convinced you not to come to China, I hope this post shows you that you MUST, MUST, MUST come to […]

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